Book Review #5 When Sinners Say "I Do"

When Sinners Say "I Do": Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage by Dave Harvey

I'm going to borrow a quote I saw posted at A Reforming Mom blog

"That's one of the ways in which the self-esteem movement works against the message of the gospel. The prevailing emphasis of our culture is to tell people that what's wrong with them is that they feel bad about themselves. If they will just feel better about themselves, they can be cured of anything.But the Bible says you'll never feel good about yourself until you learn first to feel bad about yourself. When you realize how bad things really are, then you are in a position to learn how to feel truly good. Then it won't be about you, but about the One who died to forgive your great debt so that you, in turn, can be a debt forgiver to others around you.Anytime I harbor animosity toward anyone, it is because I have diminished my sense of the debt I owe to the living God."-Alistair Begg

If you're ready to face your sin and feel bad about it then you should read this book. Though I won't get into Nouthetic counseling etc. right now, this book is from the viewpoint that problems in our relationships are due to sin. If you're sensitive to being told over and over again that you're a sinner (I am) then the first part of the book is rough but there is HOPE and it will get better. This book also addresses biblically confronting your spouse with his or her sin. As a Christian, we still need the gospel and this book reminds us of that. Marriage is used to sanctify us. I think the examples in the book are good, but there weren't enough of them! :)

My husband and I read this book together, usually reading and discussing 2 chapters each week. I would recommend this book for married couples, engaged couples and those seeking to be married. My husband recommends it for pre-marriage and marriage counseling. However, if you're not married I would strongly suggest skipping chapter 9. (Family friendly warning - this book is about marriage and so discusses issues pertaining to that relationship.)

Part of my Fall Into Reading 2007 list. Previous reviews - The Camel Club, These Strange Ashes: Is God Still in Charge?, Bleachers, and Treasuring God in Our Traditions.